15 Reasons I Love Not Fitting In

February 24, 2011 by  
Filed under personal development, self esteem

For most of my life, I’ve been told that I don’t fit in.

Really, this is ok. I struggled against being told that I’m different, I tried and tried to be like other girls, then other women, especially in college. The older I get the more I embrace the things that make me unique.

The more people I meet, the more I appreciate the person I was born to be. To me, people are like snowflakes – you’ll never meet 2 people that are exactly alike, sometimes you have to dig deeper or get to know a person better in order to realize that. But each person’s individual mark on humankind is always there.

So when Annabel over at Get In The Hot Spot wrote about 35 Ways She Doesn’t Fit In, I thought ‘how cool is this!’ and joined in the fun.

So without further ado, here are 15 reasons I love not fitting in:

  1. I’m an introvert (sometimes people are surprised when I say this, I guess because of #2). I’m really content with sitting quietly by myself, especially with a book in hand. I guess it comes from being raised as an only child.

  2. I’m pretty goofy and I love to ham it up. I didn’t appreciate this about myself until I met my best friend, who’s even more of a jokester than I am. I used to hide my sense of humor (and just make jokes in my own head) and didn’t joke that much. I find that most people either don’t have a sense of humor, or don’t find the same things funny that I do, so I tend to zip it. But once I know you like to laugh, its on!

  3. I’m shy. I wouldn’t say painfully…  having a strong sense of humor helps with breaking the ice. Sometimes I find myself cracking jokes out of nervousness, and I make myself stop and face the fear of meeting new people.

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Top 10 Blogs For Your Goals

February 17, 2011 by  
Filed under inspiration, personal development, relationships

I don’t quite remember what life was life for me before I discovered blogs. I’ve learned so much from reading blogs – I’ve become a better blogger (thanks, Annabel), entrepreneur, changed my diet, learned how to better care for my hair… the list goes on. There’s truly a blog out there for pretty much everything you want to learn or discuss.

There are several in my Google Reader that stand above the rest. Not only do I learn alot from certain bloggers, but their writing style makes their advice entertaining and engaging. I want to share my top 10 blogs with you, in the hope that you might find them useful in your goal achievement.

Upgrading your mindset

Sojourner’s Passport – Khadija’s blog is like a long, cool drink of water when you didn’t realize you were thirsty. Its the catalyst that makes you sit up straight and realize that you’ve nodded off and didn’t notice. I like to challenge paradigms, but for the most part I play it safe. She.does.not.

I highly recommend Sojourner’s Passport for the black woman who feels like she’s the only one who has certain thoughts; that the people and situations around her are not really reflective of who she is and who she’s capable of becoming; and for the woman who’s done talking and ready for action. I highly stress the word action.

Illuminated Mind – Jonathan writes about personal development but from outside the established norm. His goal is not to make you feel good, its not to regurgitate self-help cliches and he doesn’t strive to be your friend. Jonathan questions the way you think and shoves you outside your comfort zone. You can almost feel your toes going over the line that separates what you’re used to and where you need to head in order to grow.

Ridiculously Extraordinary – y’all already know I like Karol’s blog (here’s my interview with Karol). What makes Karol a cool blogger to read about is that he was never hooked into the “get a good job, buy a house, save money, retire” system that most of us were programmed to follow. So its almost like reading the thought processes of a person who lives outside the Matrix. Like Jonathan, he’s not trying to make friends – he wants you to see things in a different light.

Upgrading your appearance

Clumps of Mascara – I love Brittany’s blog because she makes makeup accessible to those of us who didn’t grow up reading fashion magazines. Brittany has written so much about all types of makeup that I come away feeling armed and dangerous in the drugstore makeup aisle. Her videos are fun to watch and sort of a refreshing opposite to all the MAC makeup gurus on Youtube.

Moptop Maven – I was really surprised to find that Nikole has only been blogging for a year. Her blog is a goldmine for information on natural hair, vintage shopping, cooking, crafting and natural living topics such as making your own products and replacing commercial products with natural ones. Sometimes when I’m tired and don’t have the energy to read I just look at all the gorgeous pics she posts.

What Would Emma Pillsbury Wear – last year I watched Glee online, since I wasn’t home to catch it when it came on tv. Outside of Glee and Family Guy, I don’t pay attention to what’s going on in tvland. I immediately loved Emma Pillsbury’s character for her clean-freakiness and her adorable, ladylike outfits. I squealed like a 5-year old when I came across WWEPW. Not only are Danielle’s posts funny, but her and her guest bloggers keep an eagle eye out for where you can buy some of the outfits from the show. Loves it!

Upgrading your relationships

Acts of Faith – Faith’s writing style is similar to Khadija’s, in that both women will not sugar coat reality for you. Faith helps you take the blinders off about your love life and encourages you to make better choices in the men you date. What I enjoy about Faith’s blog is that she totally analyzes a situation from a different point of view and pulls out wisdom that truly helps the woman who is determined to live well. If that’s you, then definitely check her out.

Black Women Interracial Marriage Ezine – I can’t remember how I found Evia’s blog, but she changed my perspective on interracial dating. Evia dispels the majority of myths that are prevalent about black women dating nonblack men. What was powerful for me, though, was all the pics that she has of happy, smiling, regular couples. It’s one thing for Melody Hobson to date George Lucas, but me and George don’t really hang out at the same Starbucks. So she shows every day black women like you and me that there’s a whole world of men that find us attractive. Her essays help you to put your best foot forward and change your dating game.

Upgrading your destination

Thrilling Heroics – Cody inspires my nomadic CEO dreams. His pics, blog posts and interviews with other mobile entrepreneurs encourage me that I, too, can have the travel freedom lifestyle. He recently launched University, where other traveling entrepreneurs can help you to reach that lifestyle goal, too. Plus its just cool to read about people who’ve broken out of cubicle nation on their own terms.

Fluent In 3 Months – Benny is a polyglot who’s learned at least 8 languages fluently, and he shows you how to become fluent in a language. He also writes about his travel experiences and his life as a technomad. What’s great about Fluent in 3 Months is that you really see that to travel the world, you don’t have to be rich. Seeing a dream come to life is awesome, don’t you think?

Check out these blogs and let me know what you think. What are some of your favorite blogs, for optimizing your goals?