Your Goals Are Waiting

As of today, there are 121 days left in 2011. I hope you haven’t given up on your goals for the year – because you still have time!

In January I wrote about setting a theme for the year, as opposed to setting resolutions. I’m really happy with that decision and I think it worked well for me. I can truly say 2011 has been epic for me – and just think, it’s not over yet!

Do you feel the same?

If not, here are ways to make sure you get it in with the time we have left.

Don’t Beat Yourself Up

If you haven’t gotten as far as you wanted to go thus far, dust yourself off and keep pushing. Now isn’t the time to beat yourself up or hold a private pity party. You don’t have time to waste on that. Instead, take a deep breath and start from where you are right now. Besides, beating yourself up feels like discipline, but it’s really not. After your emotions turn negative, it’s harder to get back on track. So don’t derail yourself further by beating yourself up.

Redefine Your Focus

I find that the later it gets in the year, the easier it becomes for me to lose focus on my priorities. It’s incredibly easy for family, work and social commitments to get in the way of my chief aims. If this is true for you, now is a good time to cut back on doing those things that aren’t helping you get to where you’re trying to go. It’s okay to say no and put yourself first, really it is. And with the months we have left in 2011, the more you stick to your main focus it’s more likely that you’ll reach your goals before the year is over.

Edit Your Plans

If you sat down in January and planned out the year, now is the perfect time to reevaluate those plans to make sure you do everything necessary to reach the finish line. You can reallocate your time and resources and decide whether some goals are still attainable – or if some of your goals will be accomplished in 2012 instead. This way, you can account for all the unexpected changes you’ve had this year (without beating yourself up!).

Celebrate How Far You’ve Come

I admit that I’m not good at celebrating the milestones to my goals. When I’m feeling pessimistic about my progress, it’s easy for me to minimize what I HAVE accomplished and not celebrate the successes that I’ve already experienced. Take time out to pat yourself on the back. Use the momentum of knowing you’re a winner to push yourself to the end of the year.

What are the goals you’re planning to reach by the end of the year? It’s not too late – share them with me in the comments.

Keep Your Focus During Christmas

A few days before Thanksgiving, Lisa, one of our fellow Motivated CEOs and Boss Ladies, asked me to write about staying focused during the holidays. I was busy with other things and wasn’t able to blog on that topic before Thanksgiving. Since we still have Christmas to go, its still an important tactic to consider while we focus on our goals.

Are The Holidays Any Different?

I personally love this time of year (except for the weather!). I love getting together with family and friends, reflecting on how blessed I am and being grateful for everything I have and everything I am. This year, though, because I am a vegan now, I really thought about some of the rituals that we participate in – and how those rituals can ultimately knock us off track of our goals.

I’m not going to front… having heaps and heaps of food in front of me made it extremely hard to stick to my guns and resolve to follow the lifestyle changes I’m making. I’m proud of myself that I didn’t eat any meat; but I still overate and felt tired, sluggish and a little disappointed in myself after Thanksgiving. That was definitely one of those times where I lost control of my intentions and didn’t use my willpower to stay the course.

But its a great lesson learned. Ultimately, holidays are days that we’ve made special in our minds, but they’re not any different than any other day. There’s still 24 hours in it, and once those 24 hours are gone, we can’t get them back.

We may have more tasks on holidays, less time for ourselves, and obligations for our time with the various holiday parties, shopping trips, dinners and visits that we make. But that’s no excuse for allowing ourselves to be derailed by others and to lose the momentum that we’ve worked so dilligently to build.

When You Fail To Plan…

I hate to say it, but I failed to plan how I’d use my time, which meant that I didn’t use it well at all. I had a vague idea of what I’d like to have accomplished with the time I had surrounding Thanksgiving, but I didn’t sit down and plan out how I’d use that time.

The strategy I plan to follow for Christmas is:

• map out the actual amount of time I’ll have over Christmas
• make a list of the tasks that I need to get done: shopping, writing, cleaning, cooking, visiting others, etc
• schedule my time, activities and rest period
• keep my schedule handy, so I’m not tempted to overeat, oversleep, and likewise waste time that I should be utilizing

The plan is pretty simple. The difficulty comes from making yourself stick to the schedule you’ve set.

Just like any other time, keep the vision of how you want things to be after the holidays: the body you are working to have (if you have weight loss goals/lifestyle changes); the budget you’re adhering to (so you won’t overspend); or any other goals that you need to work on during the holidays.

I feel much better about the likelihood of surviving Christmas with my goals intact. How about you? How will you implement these simple steps to make sure Christmas doesn’t derail your goals?

Is 2010 Over?

Have you already written off 2010 as over? Why are we in the habit of doing that? Is it because we’re so accustomed to marketing messages about Black Friday, Cyber Monday and after Christmas sales that we forget to look inward at our own events?



We still have 6 weeks left in 2010. Are there goals or intentions for this year that haven’t come into fruition for you? If so, its never too late to start, and if you can’t complete the goal in 2010, if you start now, you’ll be well on your way to completion in 2011.

How To Anchor Your Visions

Yesterday, Shannon from Reading Has Purpose left an intriguing comment on my post “What Do Your Dreams Look Like?“:

I dream everyday. I think I’m actually too busy dreaming. I envision a future so bright that I sometimes forget to live in the present moment which sometimes causes me to neglect the obligations I have today.

I think she made a great point.

Getting Lost In The Sauce

Dreaming without direction, without an action plan behind it and without parameters can sometimes lead to neglecting your present moment. There are a few ways you can avoid getting lost in your own dreams, but first you’ll have to realize the need to stay on course.

It may be tempting to live in your head instead of living right now. Especially if the dreams you live in your mind are more appealing to you than the reality you live when you open your eyes.

For me, its so much more appealing to think about the perfect man who lives in my vision for my future, then it is to meet, interact and go on dates with the men in real life who I may not like. But if I allow my creativity and desire to get in the way of the opportunities I have every day, then I won’t get any closer to realizing moments that may meet or even exceed my vision.

How To Plan Your Visualizations

The first thing I do to ensure I don’t get lost in my own head, is to set boundaries for my visualizations. I typically visualize at the same time each day, which is right before bed. After I turn off the lights and get under the covers, I let my mind roam until I fall asleep. If I have time when I wake up, I visualize for a few minutes then too.

I used to visualize for about 15 minutes at a specific time each night. But I found that that took the fun out of visualizing and I felt it becoming a chore.

I also tend to visualize one dream at a time. I tried to visualize what my perfect day would be – I saw myself running my own business, being affectionate with my future husband, and living in my dream home. I also saw myself enacting some of the habits I wanted to install, such as working out every day and eating healthy foods.

I found that to be too overwhelming. I concentrated so hard on trying to cram everything into my vision and make it perfect. It just seemed contrived to me and it wasn’t enjoyable.

So I took a step back and let pictures flash in my mind until I eased into a visualization habit that felt fun and pleasing to me, without any pressure.

When visualizing, I also focus on those aspects of my dream that feel the hardest to accomplish or the farthest away. Sometimes when thinking about something I desire to happen, if it feels too far away or too hard to accomplish, then I get discouraged about it ever happening.

So I use my visualization time to see how it’d feel to actually have it, to reassure myself that its not as far away as it seems, and that reassurance adds to my motivation as well.

Dream About Tomorrow, Live For Today

I think focusing on one goal allows me to stay grounded in the present. I try to work on more than one goal at a time, and usually the goal I’m visualizing is not one I’m actively working on. Its so easy to get discouraged when you’re not yet where you want to be – so I try not to give myself reasons to feel like my life isn’t as great right now as it could be.

I often remind myself that I’m doing the best that I can, and if I can’t say that to myself truthfully, then I ask myself what I can do better.

So by bridging the gap between my vision and my present moment, I find ways to take steps to get from where I am to where I want to be. By analyzing my actions against my visualizations, I can see the areas I need to improve or change. And I take steps toward that, so that my dreams will become real one day.

Do you ever get lost in your dreams? Is it easy to feel like your dreams are better than your current life? Leave me a comment and let me know how you feel about today’s topic.

You Are All That Matters

Don’t read this post if you want to be ordinary…

Goals, goals, goalsgoalsgoals. That’s all I’ve been talking about lately, both on this blog and in real life.

Let’s take a step back for a second.

Do you believe you will reach all of your goals?

Do you believe that you deserve every blessing, every accolade, every accomplishment and every breakthrough that’s coming your way?

Don’t just say ‘yes’. Stop and really marinate on that. I’ll be here when you get back.

(see, I’m still here.)

We are afraid of failure – what if we try and we don’t succeed? Will everyone know we’re failures? Will all those people who didn’t believe in us, who didn’t share our vision or feel our passion, stand up, thrust their fingers in our faces and say “I told you so!!”? Why do we feel like we should have more than what we already have? Why do we want to reach for more, anyway? Shouldn’t we be happy, content, satisfied with what we already have? Who are we to demand more out of life?

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Swallow Your Fear Of Success

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day about the expansion of his business. During our conversation, he remarked that he was feeling fearful of success.

I just smiled because I’ve sooo been there before. In fact, fear of success was one of the hardest things I had to overcome.

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Come Drop In My Bucket

Do you have a bucket list? I admit that I hadn’t heard of this phenomenon until the movie with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. One thing that’s funny about me, as much as I like to feel good, I avoid ‘feel good’ movies. To me they’re pointless because you already know the outcome of the movie. Well with most movies you do, but I’m just sayin’… you know if Denzel is doing something, at the end of the movie he’s gonna win. Where’s the suspense and anticipation in that? (Y’all know I’m special..lol..)

The gist of the movie was that these two old guys threw caution to the wind and had all these experiences that they’d been desiring their whole lives. They called their list their bucket list – their list of things to do before they kicked the bucket. What’s interesting is that their families didn’t like it… I mean Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson ain’t no spring chickens here, but that just shows you that no matter what you do folks are gonna have something to say. So you know what I say,

I’ve been carrying around my list in my head for years, but was inspired to share it with you guys after reading Cody’s Post over at Thrilling Heroics. And I can’t share everything… I’m an introvert at heart, so sharing my bucket list is like pulling back the dressing room curtain while I’m getting dressed! LOL

It is my hope that you’ll drop a few ideas in my bucket (hence the title of this post), and if you don’t have one, to gather your thoughts and write your dreams down. Because if you don’t at least recognize that you need a map, how can you ensure that you’ll reach all the points along your destination? I’d love it if you shared yours with me, but if not that’s ok too. I just want to inspire you to continue to dream. As Les Brown says, “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”

So here’s my list,

50+ Adventures to Embark On Before I Kick the Bucket:

(not in a particular order)

Click Here For My List

Whats Your Motivation?

This month, the wonderful ladies who join me in my Motivated Sista Circle discuss what motivated us to start on our current paths. We’d also like to know what motivated you to start on yours, and welcome any comments and questions about the journey you’ve had. Also, let’s welcome Patrenia from Personal Finance Notebook to the Circle. She is our resident financial expert and I’m glad she could join us.

I receive immense inspiration and motivation from reading the stories of other women, that’s one of the reasons I have my She-Ro series. I hope you receive the same enjoyment from reading how we all started, and that our stories inspire you to take a few more steps along your path to success.

Anilia, Motivated Sista Anilia is an entrepreneur and blogger, who writes about motivation, personal development and self-esteem. My journey on this path grew from my t-shirt business, Black Girl Tees. I kept reading that online businesses should implement blogs as a way to draw attention to the business and let customers get a feel for who the owners are. So I started the blog Black Femininity. While writing on issues affecting black women and girls, I constantly had to reign myself in from writing about more personal topics, such as goal-setting and personal development. I found it increasingly difficult to talk about the issues we face without going on these tangents. One of my strongest traits is being a good listener and I honestly enjoy when friends and family ask me for advice (but I hate when people don’t listen, and then come back and tell you that you were right… but I digress…). I started to notice that I was answering the same questions over and over again, such as “how do I start this new goal, when my mother doesn’t approve?”, “where do you get your motivation from to do all the things you do?”, and “how can I get closer to completing my goals, when I feel so stuck?”. So I felt that writing about personal development, self-esteem, goal setting and the law of attraction – topics I am more knowledgable about – would be a better tool for other women to use, instead of just limiting myself to news topics that affect black women and girls. I’ve been blogging at Motivated Sista for 10 months now, and feel that I definitely made the right decision. Now I’m ready to take my blog to the next level!

Patrenia, Personal Finance Notebook Patrenia is an Accredited Financial Counselor and entrepreneur who writes about ideas, education and motivation for financial success at Personal Finance Notebook. My current path is teaching and discussing the object that’s needed almost as much as oxygen – money. The motivation came from my own personal and work related experiences with money. See, I had no problem making money; keeping more of it was the issue. For my husband and I, maintaining a home and the needs of two growing kids became a roller coaster ride of a growing – declining – depleted savings fund. After many moments of frustration and realizing that we had it all wrong, we became students to learn how money should really be managed and successfully paid off about $93,000 in debt along the way. Being in the mortgage industry, I also noticed that many of my clients had the same money issues. So after recognizing that my clients, most of my friends and family and I had it all wrong…I became compelled to share this information. My hope is that many people will be intrigued with the information I share, seek knowledge and take action to transform their financial lives. I now know that it CAN be done!

CW, Black Women Deserve Better CW’s blog “Black Women Deserve Better” was an exercise in truth, self-discovery and healing. It is her mission to help Black women get the love, respect and commitment they deserve. Circa 2001 (Particularly after September 11th), I began deeply contemplating the direction in which my life was moving. Events such as these remind us that life is too short to waste on non-productive endeavors. It was as if myself, and nearly every Black woman who I encountered was on the same hamsterwheel. Stats such as age, height, weight, education level were not a mitigating factor in this phenomenon: On the job, the neighborhood, family, friends and friends of friends. Our stories were eerily similar. Being trapped (self-imposed or otherwise) in our routine…Or shall I say stagnation? Visiting the same hang-out spots, dating the same types of men and having the same conversations ABOUT those alleged men. This scenario played out time and time again over the years. At some point along the way, it was unfathomable that I was the only one sick and tired of being sick and tired. Without veering too far off topic, a number of Black women are familiar with being told: How to feel What their standards should be What is “expected” of them Topics which have been discussed ad-nauseum on the BWE (black women empowerment) blogs. I found it quite amusing that for all the things we ought to do, our situation overall wasn’t much improving. I observed an increase in OOW (out of wedlock) children, decrease in marriage, abdication of male responsibility, bashing of Black women and the haphazard “dating”. We are well aware of the negative behaviors which manifest as a result, but nonetheless, our children have suffered most. I want to give our daughters a fighting chance at living quality adult lives, with healthy relationships. This is one of the reasons I began “Black Women Deserve Better” three years ago. My book (by the same name) reveals the mind control and deceptions used (often by “our own”), to keep Sisters in their place. But my work doesn’t stop there. I periodically facilitate workshops and design courses to assist Black women in navigating the treacherous waters. In addition, one of the new hats I’m wearing is “Dating & Life Coach”. The goal is to uncover the real reasons why we often run into walls -and I have already ran into most of them a while back! My desire is for Black women not only to want change, but also to BE THAT CHANGE. Know that our daughters are counting on us! Anilia’s note: please check out CW’s book, Black Women Deserve Better and her online workshop, Building Upon The Change.

Kim, Fit Sisters Boot Camp Kim is a teacher by day and has her own fitness business where she helps women to get into the best shape of their lives. I combined my love of teaching with my love of staying healthy to start my boot camp business. I believe that you must put your health first, because if you’re not healthy then your quality of life is at jeopardy. Staying healthy is a lifestyle — not a one-time act. Once you get into the groove of that lifestyle and start reaping the benefits, you will never go back. I love helping and showing people “the way” to a better quality and more fulfilling way of life by putting one’s self first.

Danielle, The Style and Beauty Doctor Danielle is a stylist and makeup artist with a financial industry background. She is also president of Urban Glamour LLC, an image consulting company that offers personal styling, wedding, and makeup services. She also edits a fashion and beauty blog, The Style and Beauty Doctor. My motivation came just when I was on line waiting for my college graduation to start. I was getting my BBA in Marketing and was kind of just standing there thinking about my future… when I overheard two girls saying they would take classes at The Fashion Institute of Technology. Who knew eavesdropping could take you on your path! I knew I always wanted to do something in fashion — in high school people would often ask me what to wear with what — I just never thought I could make a career out of it. Several months after graduation, I enrolled in the Image Consulting program and then completed the two year program. I’m so glad I made my decision. Never before have I felt so “myself” than when I can tell someone what looks great on their body type and/or skin tone. I love what I do!

Tamyka, The CEOMamma Tamyka is a wife, mother and entrepreneur. She’s the Founder/Owner of TheCEOMamma and teach women entrepreneurs how to build a business on a budget. There were a couple of things that motivated me to journey down my current career path. The first being that I was gifted with an entrepreneurial Spirit. I knew from a very young age I wasn’t cut out to work for someone else. I always had the drive and passion to “create my own”…whatever it may be! The second motivational force is that I truly enjoy helping people. Not just in business, but however I can. I’ve always seemed to attract people who felt comfortable enough to share with me their deepest worries and concerns and I’d freely offer up support, encouragement and guidance. Growing up, I was often misunderstood and my ideas often went unsupported, especially when I started my first business in Direct Sales (even by my own family). As an adult, things didn’t change much. I began to realize many entrepreneurs experience the same things and I wanted to be of help to those who needed it. In my business, I share many resources and tips on building and marketing a business on a budget and have inspired many women in the process. I know this is the right path for me because I’m truly fulfilled in what I do! Give and it will come back to you, go measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over…is what I believe and live.

So tell us, Motivated CEOs and Boss Ladies, what motivated you to start on your current path? How is your journey unfolding?

Your Best Vision Board Ever

I just love these things. I won’t stop talking about vision boards. They just make me feel so good!

In this first video, you’ll see how I created my latest one. I blogged about how to create your mission statement for your board in this post. And let me tell you, it was so great to see my great new board when I woke up this morning!



This second video is about things to keep in mind when incorporating your vision board into your law of attraction habits. When I look at other people’s vision videos on Youtube, I always wonder if the mansions, cars and vacation pics that are used really help the person focus on their goals. I also wonder how many people are successful in manifesting those things, because they’re not very targeted to a specific goal (or at least don’t seem to be in my point of view, I could always be wrong). For more on focusing on specific goals, read this post that I wrote a while back.

Motivated Sista Circle

Introducing: Motivated Sista Circle

One of the reasons I became a motivation/personal development blogger was that I am constantly surrounded by dynamic, inspiring women. Some of those women don’t see how amazing they are (and I hope you realize your own value when I write); some of them have also taken their knowledge to the internet to teach others how to live their best lives, as I have.

I’ve assembled a circle of fabulous, motivated sistas to continue to inspire our readers to strive for success. I’ve dubbed this inspiration roundtable as the Motivated Sista Circle. Once a month, we’ll post our thoughts on an intriguing question, and hope that our collective voices will motivate you to continue to reach your goals.

May’s Motivated Sista Circle

Our question for May: how do you define success?

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